SeyCon5 “After-party” Impacts Production

SeyllInSide Journal

SeyCon5 “After-party” Impacts Production

7.10.YC118

The fifth Seyllin Conference is being held on a gas extraction facility, suspended in the upper atmosphere of the gas giant Seyllin VIII. Although the facility’s administrators predicted this would have a slight disturbing effect on production, a source near the facility’s management predicts that an impromptu after-party at the canteen has led to a further 1% decrease in production this week. No after-party was scheduled to take place after the 1st day of the conference, and it was expected that most of the capsuleers visiting the conference would depart some time after the first day came to an end, as the facility’s accommodations are quite spartan, and many already departed to take part in an expedition into the Anoikis system they refer to as Redoubt.

However, at least one capsuleer remained at the facility, and visited the canteen some time after arranging one of those spartan accomodations. The word is that former capsuleer sub-warp racing champion and humanitarian Ché Biko, these days a colonist in Anoikis, arranged an open bar, and started celebrating with the facilty staff present.

An employee of the canteen reports: “[Ché Biko] came in and arranged the open bar…he looked kinda tired or sad at first, but that changed quickly. He mingled with some production staff, ordering rounds of drinks and toasting to the successful completion of the first operation of his new mining vessel, which had returned safely after coming under attack. More and more people came into the canteen after word started to spread, and Ché…Msr. Biko wanted to increase the volume of the music, and I obliged…he started dancing and encouraged others to do the same. He also got some people to go and get some party lights. Soon, the place was pretty packed, things like this don’t happen every day here. This night will likely go in the books as the most profitable of the year…for the canteen, I mean.”

Another witness tells us: “Biko was genuinely having fun, but it was clear to me that he had another reason for coaxing us to let loose. Between and during his anecdotes, he was eyeing some of the women. And I’m pretty sure one of them joined him when he left the canteen to go to his accomodations.”

Our inside source sheds light on the afterparty’s aftermath: “Following the…celebration…there has been a considerable increase in people taking a sick day, and there was also a significant increase in staff not arriving for their shifts in time.”

Upon inquiry, a spokesperson for the facility states: “It is true that…there have been some difficulties during the shift change this morning, but it is all within acceptable margins. [..] There will be no exceptional penalties for the staff that…celebrated a bit too much.”

Today is the second and last day of SeyCon5, and the day ends with a reception. Although it is expected to be quite different from what happened in the canteen last night, Ché Biko is expected to attend this reception, so time will tell if there will be a repeat later tonight.

Ché Biko could not be reached for comment before publication of this article.

Author
Che Biko

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